I Feel Just Like Paris Hilton...With Boobs

[crazydiamondsue]

Lately, my whole life has been an experiment in terror. When it comes to suffering, I'm right up there with Elizabeth Taylor. (Yes, Vin, that was for you.)

First thing: My website, Beauty Effulgent, is unavailable. Because I can't get into my hotmail account, I missed the notifications that ivillage is no longer hosting member websites. So that means my fics, my recs and my tiny archive are offline. As well as my mood theme, dammit!! 'Cause right now, pissed would be GREAT! They're offering to transfer the accounts to Lycos, but I liked ivillage - it was small and didn't have pop-ups. Crap.



Two months ago, I had a nice thing going on LJ. I had a WIP I enjoyed writing, a lively repartee with my flist and I was adored by hun...doz...at least six people.

Now I have a computer that must be travelling back from California to Oklahoma via carrier pigeon or stolen demon gang motorcycle. It's taking that long, anyway.

Also:

A website that doesn't work (may not EVER work?) and hours of linking put into it.

A house that won't be mine for another week and living my entire life in one bedroom, obsessively watching TV and reading Cosmo...okay, kinda like college, so really, kind of fun. Except no sex. Wait a second - exactly like college! (Kidding, Caza. Like freshman year, okay?)

An undying love of Spander that blinded me to all else. I get my computer at work back online and what have I read today?

I can't tell you everything about this, but a sneak peek of stoney321's Buffyverse parody of "Annie" written for Yin's ficathon. Let's just say it involves a song called, "It's a Hard Cock Life," and something so dirty!bad!wrong she's going to have to make several humanitarian gestures. In a word: it's fucking brilliant.

Also:

Spuffy like it was meant to be by uberaeryn
QaF RPS by adis723
Spangel Human AU prison fic by toobusy2write
and
Salon worthy Peace Corps stories by camisha

Oh! Wait!!! I read reremouse and camisha's "In From the Cold" tag fic. Ha! Spander 4-Ever!!!

I want my laptop (and the uncompleted last chapter of Sunday so that it can become the completed last part of Sunday). I want my new house (and someone else to move my furniture in.) I want my website back up and functioning. I want the phone to ring and someone else be responsible for answering it. (Sorry, random work thing.)

Again, this email was just made to inform anyone trying to access my website that it will be temporarily down until I figure out what's up with Lycos. All of this bitching was tongue-in-cheek, btw. Except about the website. I am wicked pissed about that.

Comments

[crazydiamondsue.livejournal.com]

You know what we should bring back? Chain letters. I would write to you and four others and then you would follow suit and make everyone who received do the same and if they did - James Marsters would have a career! We'd revolutionalize fandom.

Give me 15 minutes, a glue stick, a star shaped cutter, a pic of JM with appropriately emaciated cheekbones and I'll get the letterhead started...

My poor fics. Alone in cyberspace and probably being laughed at by the scrapbooking and knitting sites also jettisoned from ivillage...

[ex-dovil323.livejournal.com]

Give me 15 minutes, a glue stick, a star shaped cutter, a pic of JM with appropriately emaciated cheekbones and I'll get the letterhead started...

Bwah ha ha! You funny! I say we just slap a couple of cheekbones, a lip, some blue dots for eyes and then use some white pipecleaners for hair and wahla!, it's JM. In my dream I was quite rude to him over breakfast. I was going, yeah, it's probably a good idea doing the whole convention thing. You keep doing that hon. I'll never get an invite to another imaginary breakfast at this rate.

Though who knows, maybe Scooby Doo 4 will come out and SMG and JM can reunite and have dirty wrong sex in the back of the Mystery Van.

iVillage sucks. I say we storm it and burn it to the ground and spread vicious rumour about it.