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secondverse had a great 5 questions meme on her LJ, so I asked her to question me. She asks great questions - I give 'meh' answers.
1. You write a complicated, not-always-easy, yet very hot Spike and Xander. What draws you to the pairing, and why do you write them the way that you do?
I didn’t discover fic, at all, until recently, and it wasn’t until a friend threw in a random S/X pairing in a Buffy round robin snark that I heard of the pairing. I went off to investigate, and luckily discovered mpoetess and your LTG first. I think future fics are my fave – Repossession, LTG – (because I think Xander would have the maturity to handle the vamp and bi aspects) but I wanted to set my story mid-series so I’d have canon as a plot guide (I was scared.) That turned out to make the story more difficult, because I had to deal with “feelings for Buffy” Spike and “engaged to Anya” Xander. I wanted to do justice to both of those relationships (whatever my own feelings about them) and using Buffy’s death as a backdrop got all of the characters to the dark, vulnerable place I needed. I think Spike and Xander see all of the possibilities in each other that the people around them can’t see or don’t want to believe. I think they’re both capable of great love, great darkness and are ultimately the most destructive to themselves. And none of that sums up why I love them together. I think Spike/Angel or Angel/Xander or even Spike/Willow (if I’m in the mood for het) can be hot, but I believe Spike/Xander.
2. Tell me about the first thing you ever wrote? Was it good? Bad? Silly? What did it mean to you?
I always doodled little half-finished “stories,” but the first thing I actually wrote in all seriousness was when I was 13. My cousin had been killed in a car accident and I wrote a poem called “Lonely” about the experience. I’d love to say it was brilliant, but it was maudlin, overwrought, and, I believe, quoted Journey lyrics. It got lots of squees from the junior high set, which, as tacky as it sounds, may have to led to the “death is my gift” theme in my writing. (My first novel was called “Grave Dancer.”) I’m drawn to dark realism in fantasy, but I also tend to snark and snerk before anything else. I will usually giggle at schmoop, but if you can do it well, you’ll have my heart forever. I think that writing that poem (and the reaction it got from my friends and family) made me realize I might be able to do something not everyone else could do, which pretty much increased my childhood feelings of isolation, but gave me more time to write.
3. You seem to be very much in love with your hubby - was it love at first sight? A slow build? A groovy kind of love? Oh, I’d love to say it was love at first sight, but all I saw was a tall, skinny Star Trek geek and all he saw was a short, chunky former cheerleader with an accent straight out of southeastern Oklahoma. We were housemates for a while, and the Star Trek grew on me and the cheerleader fantasy grew on him, and we realized we both worshipped the hell out of each other, and who doesn’t want to be worshipped? Besides, who wouldn’t want a man who does dishes, laundry, speaks 4 languages fluently and will seriously consider questions like, “Do you think I used ‘cock’ too many times in this sequence?” (btw: “Groovy Kind of Love” was his song with his ex-girlfriend, so that part made me giggle.)
4. What is your favorite outfit? Why?
A super-short black miniskirt and a red, semi-sheer blouse patterned with black and white flowers (which is much cuter than that sounded – some descriptive writer I am) paired with clunky black platform sandals. The shirt draws all eyes to my breasts and gives me the illusion of a waist, and the short skirt makes the fact that I have size 2 legs on a size 10 body seem to work. This is my, “It’s summer – bring on the boys (for looking!) and beers (for drinking!)” outfit.
5. How do you feel about other people in real life? Are you social? Anti? Do you feel like it's your job to help others, or do you wish they'd all screw off? I always describe myself as a constantly shifting blend of Dolly Parton and Courtney Love. Try livin’ with that, baby. So sometimes I’m dying to buy the world a coke, and other times I want to tell it to fuck off! I’m social (especially if I’m with someone I know to bounce off of) and I love people as long as I’m not dealing with them in a “service” capacity. However, I have ingrained southern manners that won't allow Courtney to the fore unless A) much alcohol is involved or B) you threaten my principles – see bigots and homophobic ass monkeys – or my sweet little husband. However, I mostly want to be loved, so honestly, I’m pretty darn sweet, pretty much always.
Anyone want me to delve into their psyche with carefully chosen questions? No, I'm not just going to repeat Yin's questions. (Unless you're not on her flist - shhh!) Hee!
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no subject
Date: 2004-09-14 12:33 pm (UTC)From:I'd volunteer, but I doubt there's anything you've always wanted to ask me that hasn't been asked by now!
no subject
Date: 2004-09-14 01:05 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2004-09-14 01:10 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2004-09-14 01:26 pm (UTC)From:But the icon is a girl... Aren't you a girl?
Date: 2004-09-14 01:30 pm (UTC)From:And former cheerleaders and tall Star Trek geeks go hand in hand. Allen is you and I am Caza, apparently. Except not tall and thin.
you married a cheerleader?
Date: 2004-09-14 01:35 pm (UTC)From:now I am thinking of the male cheerleaders in "Bring it On," and the way the football players always tried, and failed, to insult them.
Re: you married a cheerleader?
Date: 2004-09-14 01:57 pm (UTC)From:And I'm a Torro *clapclap clap*
And I love High School *clapclap clap*
My wife's a geek *stompstomp clap*
Re: But the icon is a girl... Aren't you a girl?
Date: 2004-09-14 01:39 pm (UTC)From:Ooo, raggin' Caza's icon. Smack down!
But COurtney Love
Date: 2004-09-14 01:55 pm (UTC)From:I'm kidding. About the shooting.
And if one didn't know who Caza was, they would have a mental picture of veiny Anya. Which he DOES NOT look like.
Re: But COurtney Love
Date: 2004-09-14 02:00 pm (UTC)From:Please don't encourage Caza. He made an icon of Buffy and him going to the prom. Really. He'll use it. Anya's good (pets the icon), good Anya...
Re: But COurtney Love
Date: 2004-09-14 02:34 pm (UTC)From:*Sits in the corner and pouts*
Re: But COurtney Love
Date: 2004-09-14 02:37 pm (UTC)From:Re: But COurtney Love
Date: 2004-09-14 02:43 pm (UTC)From:Re: But COurtney Love
Date: 2004-09-14 03:03 pm (UTC)From:Now. I want to see this prom icon so bad I HURT inside. I'm emailing you a pic of me and the man so we are balanced. I've seen you with your fantastic hair and the man, so fair's fair. We are the McNormaltons of Dorktown.
please don't tell people I look like Faith!
Date: 2004-09-14 04:40 pm (UTC)From:Re: please don't tell people I look like Faith!
Date: 2004-09-14 06:57 pm (UTC)From: