Damn, this is one amazing chapter!!! *flails* You bring on the pain and the hurt so very well. And there's still those awesome funny moments. I feel like I'm reading a Buffy episode.
Okay, you had me crying during the Xander and Anya scene. My favourite kinds of scenes like this are the ones when both parties are sympathetic and have a valid perspective. And you totally accomplished that. Kudos because that is a very hard thing to do. Also, you do Anya's voice so well and I know how difficult she is to write and you totally and completely capture her: “I don’t know what to do, Xander.” She gasped a little, jerking as she laughed harshly. “I feel sad, but I feel so angry, too. And the angrier I get, the less sad I feel.” She reached a hand up, brushing tears back with an irritated motion. “Is this right? Am I doing it…right?” WOW!!! *sniffs*
This was definitely one of the parts that had me sobbing: He didn’t understand how they’d gotten here. All he remembered was a beautiful girl, her dress sliding down her naked thighs to puddle at her feet, her hand held out, offering him everything. He felt the tears in his throat and managed to choke out, “So…what now?”
If I quoted everything I like it would be, well, everything. So in lieu of that level of insanity, I want to note this wonderful moment in which Anya zeroes in - in exactly her honest and insightful way - on Xander's big issue that needs to be resolved: Xander flinched and Anya opened the door, looking back at him. “I know why I stayed here, Xander.” Her eyes met his in silent acknowledgement. “Do you?” Oh! And I adore all the details in the scene, like the vitamin bottle and the shampoo.
Giles leaving just adds to the heart-break (which I'm not complaining about!) and is another really well done scene. These are such perfect reactions: Xander snorted, dropping his head and shaking it in bemused disgust. Willow was there ahead of him, though, leaping in with, “What? When?”
The angry confrontation is excellent. I love how that tougher Ripper aspect of Giles shines through but that you don't spell out the Ripper thing. This is such an amazing description of the Xander's rage: Xander felt his body flush and there was a sharp ringing in his ears, and then suddenly he found himself with his fists clenched in Giles’s shirt collar, Dawn crying and tugging at his arms as Willow tried to force herself between them, commanding him to stop.
And the explanation for the hellmouth-Slayer connection is really painful (but again good!). It makes so much sense in the show's mythology which includes things about the balance between good and evil, so it follows that an increase in goodness would increase the badness. And I love how after the tense scene you end on a funny note: “Take a stake!” the ‘Bot called cheerfully, tossing him one.
I adore Xander's realization that Spike's been stalking him and his corresponding increasing anger. I love Xander's line and the description is very hot, and it'salso an interesting insight into how Xander's original intention has been surprised: “I’m a man, and sometimes men just…fuck,” Xander finished, lunging forward and crushing his lips to Spike’s, taking advantage of the vampire’s sharp gasp to thrust his tongue into the coolness Spike’s mouth. His free hand reached up and grasped Spike’s jaw, holding him there as he deepened the kiss, their mouths diving again and again in a way that was harder, hotter than anything Xander had expected from this little experiment in…control. I believe you're missing a word, "thrust his tongue into the coolness [of] Spike's mouth.
Xander's self-loathing is really well done. Spike's reaction to Xander's aggressiveness is perfect: Spike straightened his jacket and picked up the cigarette that still smoldered on the ground. He took a deep drag and released the smoke with a satisfied sneer. “Not the way to discourage a vampire, mate.”
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
chiming
no subject
Date: 2006-05-24 07:08 am (UTC)From:Okay, you had me crying during the Xander and Anya scene. My favourite kinds of scenes like this are the ones when both parties are sympathetic and have a valid perspective. And you totally accomplished that. Kudos because that is a very hard thing to do. Also, you do Anya's voice so well and I know how difficult she is to write and you totally and completely capture her:
“I don’t know what to do, Xander.” She gasped a little, jerking as she laughed harshly. “I feel sad, but I feel so angry, too. And the angrier I get, the less sad I feel.” She reached a hand up, brushing tears back with an irritated motion. “Is this right? Am I doing it…right?” WOW!!! *sniffs*
This was definitely one of the parts that had me sobbing:
He didn’t understand how they’d gotten here. All he remembered was a beautiful girl, her dress sliding down her naked thighs to puddle at her feet, her hand held out, offering him everything. He felt the tears in his throat and managed to choke out, “So…what now?”
If I quoted everything I like it would be, well, everything. So in lieu of that level of insanity, I want to note this wonderful moment in which Anya zeroes in - in exactly her honest and insightful way - on Xander's big issue that needs to be resolved:
Xander flinched and Anya opened the door, looking back at him. “I know why I stayed here, Xander.” Her eyes met his in silent acknowledgement. “Do you?”
Oh! And I adore all the details in the scene, like the vitamin bottle and the shampoo.
Giles leaving just adds to the heart-break (which I'm not complaining about!) and is another really well done scene. These are such perfect reactions:
Xander snorted, dropping his head and shaking it in bemused disgust.
Willow was there ahead of him, though, leaping in with, “What? When?”
The angry confrontation is excellent. I love how that tougher Ripper aspect of Giles shines through but that you don't spell out the Ripper thing. This is such an amazing description of the Xander's rage:
Xander felt his body flush and there was a sharp ringing in his ears, and then suddenly he found himself with his fists clenched in Giles’s shirt collar, Dawn crying and tugging at his arms as Willow tried to force herself between them, commanding him to stop.
And the explanation for the hellmouth-Slayer connection is really painful (but again good!). It makes so much sense in the show's mythology which includes things about the balance between good and evil, so it follows that an increase in goodness would increase the badness. And I love how after the tense scene you end on a funny note:
“Take a stake!” the ‘Bot called cheerfully, tossing him one.
I adore Xander's realization that Spike's been stalking him and his corresponding increasing anger. I love Xander's line and the description is very hot, and it'salso an interesting insight into how Xander's original intention has been surprised:
“I’m a man, and sometimes men just…fuck,” Xander finished, lunging forward and crushing his lips to Spike’s, taking advantage of the vampire’s sharp gasp to thrust his tongue into the coolness Spike’s mouth. His free hand reached up and grasped Spike’s jaw, holding him there as he deepened the kiss, their mouths diving again and again in a way that was harder, hotter than anything Xander had expected from this little experiment in…control. I believe you're missing a word, "thrust his tongue into the coolness [of] Spike's mouth.
Xander's self-loathing is really well done. Spike's reaction to Xander's aggressiveness is perfect:
Spike straightened his jacket and picked up the cigarette that still smoldered on the ground. He took a deep drag and released the smoke with a satisfied sneer. “Not the way to discourage a vampire, mate.”
Comment continued....